I am SOOOOOOOO disappointed with myself!!!!!
I had lost 50 pounds, and I was feeling GREAT - I mean it GREAT! I had a renewed sense of life, I was out and about always on the move. My body was HAPPY that's the best way I can explain it. Well not no more! I have gained I would guess around 10 pounds back (I haven't gotten on the scale because I am so sick of myself). The weight is all setting right in my belly so it is not hard to see. I complain about it all the time but the funny thing is I just don't have the drive to get myself back to where I want to be for some reason..... I just don't understand it since I felt so much better why would I let myself get like this again???? I ask myself that all the time too and I just can't seem to find the answers. Of course I can find a TON of reason why I allow my self to eat the junk that is adding on the pounds, like this morning I ate almost an entire box of weight watchers ice cream bars for breakfast - What the Hell!!!!! When I am stressed I eat, there is my problem. When I lost all the weight before life was good here, we had no money worries which made a huge difference for me. Now things are back to living week to week if that, we are usually borrowing for next weeks pay to get thru this week. My first thought is to get an ice cream bar or just a few pieces of candy or maybe grab a jar of peanut butter and eat away when I need to escape from my worries. I really want to stop this NOW before I gain more back and slip back to my old self which I didn't care for. So with your help I am going to add in exercise and try and get back to my better way of eating by blogging about my struggles instead of eating. I am grabbing myself by the boot straps and am pulling up : )
After eating the box of ice cream bars this morning I said no more and pulled on my sports bra & sneakers and got out there and jogged (I use that word lightly) around the block. I would be misleading you if I didn't tell you I only jogged just to my neighbors mail box and then had to walk most of the rest of the way around but I got out there it is a start. I went a little after 9am this morning and it was already too hot and humid here in my part of Florida (even my dog who I took with me had his tongue hanging down to the ground). Tomorrow I have to get my butt up even earlier and get out there. I am going to use a measuring tape to give me a starting point as to where I am now so "hopefully" I can see some improvement with my new exercise routine.
I want to get back to this happy body, picture taken 4/6/2014!!!!
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