Mondays Do Suck!!

I sorry I have to complain today!
I give a 110% at my job every day, that's a fact. Now granted cleaning is not rocket science but I really try hard to make the place look great. I listen to everything my boss says to do and I do it. Today she was on my butt for not keeping up on changing the air fresheners! She made me feel like a total ass in front of the new girl (who is 16 yrs. old). I just feel like a deflated balloon, since I give so much of myself to the job and she still treats me like an asshole. I see why so many people don't give a shit at their jobs, Is it really worth it? I mean why go the extra mile to do your best when the bosses treat you like garbage. I love my job but honestly it is so hard to keep up your self esteem when some one degrades you like my boss does. The funny thing is my boss asked me to consider taking the veterinary assistant job that is available, HELLO if your not happy with the way I can't remember to change the air fresheners why would you want me to be in charge of the care of a recovering animal??????? My mother always told me to treat people the way you want to be treated, I really try and live by that rule. Hurting peoples feelings is just such a low thing to do. Now I'm not saying when you screw up you shouldn't get a talking to, but do it in a manner that is productive not shredding a persons self esteem. Maybe I take things to personally! I really should let this kind of thing roll off my back and not care so much I guess. As for the tech assistant job I was really thinking of trying it, but now I am really worried it will just be too much stress. I NEED the extra money for sure and really would hate turning a job down since honestly how many people want to hire a 52 year old who doesn't have very much past work history?????? I'll pray about it and see what happens.
Thanks for listening to my rant today, Mondays are really tough some weeks : (

Until Next Time - God Bless!!

Weight Loss & Life.... Shit Happens!

It's strange how people come into your life who affect you and you don't even know them that well. Let me fill you in, where I work the people who own the store next to us run a motorcycle repair shop. They are a nice couple who actually invited me over for cake when the wife was celebrating her 62nd birthday. Anyway, the man is sick, very sick from what I can gather. They are packing their shop up, I guess they are going out of business. Their friends have been stopping by to help them pack & move, you can tell it is such a sad time for all of them. I feel bad that here they must have worked really hard over the years to have their own business and now sickness is robbing them out of it. The wife looks so sad as you can imagine, she must be dealing with so much. It really makes you look at your own life and say "What the hell am I complaining about"!! Life does go by so fast and then you are at middle age and the body starts to have issues just when you need it most. I mean really your eyesight goes bad, your pains gets worse, things just start flaring up. Then you yell at your self for not taking better care of that body of yours when you were younger...... Last year I think I was in the best shape of maybe my entire life and I let it slip away! I can tell you when your body feels good it really feels good (does that make sense?). I pray I can get back to that soon. I know I CAN do it, it is just a matter of doing it. Like today I bought another box of the weight watcher ice cream bars! I know I can not keep eating them and get back to where I need to be weight wise but I still keep eating them : (  I am at 143.2 pounds this morning and my pants are tight as hell. At work I had to unbutton the top button of my pants to be able to do my job! But yet I was there at Target buying that box of ice cream, WHY! I just don't get it. I have been buying watermelon as much as I can because I LOVE watermelon and I am hoping it will help be move away from the ice cream. It's funny how I find so many reasons to buy the ice cream each day like, I'm tired from work and I need a quick snack, I have had a shitty day, I feel depressed ect., all of these reasons would correct themselves if I would just stop the ice cream because eating right makes your whole out look on things so much better, you have energy for the stress that pops up and you just feel so much better you can handle anything. Isn't it funny how we all know this but yet we still eat incorrectly.
Anyway, I really am going to try and get myself back to feeling better. Just seeing my work neighbor and what he is going through just shows me we don't know how long we have got on this earth but you might as well try and be your healthiest while your here so you can enjoy it!!

Until Next Time - God Bless!! 

Exercise and Weight Loss, Do You Need To Do it?

I was reading an article that stated exercise is not necessary for weight loss. Looking back at my weight loss and I think you really need to keep yourself moving to lose weight. Maybe not jumping on an exercise bike or a treadmill per say but you really need to keep the body moving and NOT sitting at the computer for hours on end. I think that is one of the reasons I am having so much trouble losing again, I spend WAY to much time sitting at the computer! I used to drive down town almost every day and shop at the thrift stores or going to the farmers market and just walking. I thought by getting a job and bending and lifting ect. for that I would be losing weight but as the article said many people who exercise make themselves eat more because they are hungrier. I am starving after my three little hours of work and come home eat, usually at least three weight watcher ice cream bars and maybe even a sandwich then I take a nap. Hello, where is the movement in that! I know you must be saying three hours of work and she is shot? Yes, I used to think I was in pretty good shape after losing the weight, I even started to think about jogging but now all I think about is when I can get back to sleep. If I had insurance I would like to go and have my blood tested to see what I am lacking because it has to be something. I know since adding back sugar into my eating that also is dragging me down, I remember when cherry tomatoes used to taste so sweet to me but now after living on the weight watcher bars I can't enjoy the fruit and vegetables at all now. In reading the "Body Clutter" book it states if you have trigger foods that you just have to keep them OUT of your house! I need to do this with the dam weight watcher ice cream bars!! I keep telling myself one reason after another on why I need them just to get me through on thing after another but in reality they are messing me all up. Okay, now that I stated it out loud - I am NOT going to buy them again!! I will not let them jump into my shopping cart no matter what and then let me see if I can not get back to enjoying the sweet taste of cherry tomatoes and other healthier foods.
Good luck on your weight loss journey!

Until Next Time - God Bless!!

Remember When......

Remember when I posted how the scale just was not budging....... Well it budged! It went up to 142.8 this morning! As I said I have been OUT OF CONTROLL! Today I was watching myself to see what the issues are and again it is stress. I was at work and my husband stopped by and said the guys he is working for never showed up to work..... This is getting terrible he has had a lot of off time. Just when I was hoping we could finally start doing some fun things with my money I am making from my job it gets shot down again. All this just drove me right to Target to buy those weight watcher ice creams and I ate the whole box! It's funny but I have like a hum in my body all the time, I think it might my high blood pressure or something. It sure isn't energy, but I do have to say I do feel a little more energy since taking the vitamins. They do cause a lot of gas though. I have been having such a tough time with all of the UTI & yeast infections that I just keep getting. I am taking the cranberry pills ever day in hopes that it will help. The infections just kick my butt, it hurts and it rings me out like a wet wash cloth. This week I am hoping to be able to make it all week without one rearing its ugly head again.
So stress, What can we do about it? That is a good question......

Until Next Time - God Bless!!

Bike Riding Anyone?

See, here I am really getting out there on my bike and trying to exercise! The funny thing is we have been having a terrible time with dogs coming out and chasing us where ever we ride, so our trips have been cut short some nights : (  This whole week I have been really stuck at 141.6, the scale just won't seem to budge! Of course I am still having a lot of issues with the weight watcher ice cream bars & honey barbecue chips...... could that be why the scale hasn't moved down any?????? I did buy a bag of cherries today, they were $4.99 a pound! Yikes!! I spent $9.33 on them! Isn't that terrible? They keep saying that you can eat healthy without spending an arm & a leg but I just don't see it. Red peppers which we love are $1.85 a pepper.... come on it is way more expensive to buy good food than to buy boxed crap. Anyway, now I just have to stop my ice cream/chip habit and eat the cherries & grapes and I should be good to go again.
Oh yea one more thing, my Target has decided to stop stocking the Zevia soda that I have been drinking, it is a real bummer for me since that is the only thing I drink besides water. On the other hand it just means I will be drinking a lot more water which will be a good thing. We buy the Target brand bottled water at $3.19 for 24 bottles, You can beat that price!

Until Next Time - God Bless!!

Thoughts Of My Mother

As Mother's Day approaches I always think of my mom and it makes me so sad. She would love to see my grand-daughter and would be so proud of my son Kristopher on what a great father he is becoming. Don't you think it is a rip how the most important people get old and leave you for ever just at the time when you really would treasure them? Life goes by so fast that you don't think twice about your parents but then before you know it they pass on and you are left all alone. Of course you may have a husband, children or friends that can fill up your life by there is no replacement for your mother! There are times that I wish I could just have a day with her to tell her all that has gone on my life and I know she would listen as she always did never passing judgment and always being the positive person that she was. I think that is one of the biggest things I miss about her, she always had my back no matter what.
If you are lucky enough to still have your mom around this Mother's Day, give her a big hug and let her tell you all those old stories that you may have heard a hundred times because belive me there will be a day in the future when you would give anything to just hear her voice one more time!!

Until Next Time - God Bless!!

To Nap Or Not To Nap, That Is The Question....

Do you all take naps during the day?
I have been trying to decide it taking a nap is helping me or hurting me in the long run.
I find that is I nap during the day it hinders my ability to sleep soundly at night, but if I don't take a nap I am shot during the evening hours when there is just too much to do.
I have been really struggling with restful sleep lately due to my back pain, it's not all the time but when it hits it takes my breath away. I have never had back pain before so I am guessing it is from lifting the heavy mop bucket at work. I always take three Advil at night but that doesn't seem to help the back pain.
Anyway, How is the weight thing going? I'm still at 141.6 I would have thought I would have lost at least a little bit since my daughter and I have been riding bikes for at least 20 minutes if not more every night. I just am feeling so tired all the time it has me worried. I just can't seem to find any energy to do things, everything drains me. I see watermelon is starting to come down in price so I am hoping that helps with the weight loss and I started taking my vitamins again "Alive Energy for Women". I am hoping I can get back my mojo!

Until Next Time - God Bless!!